I love coffee. It's Red Bull for old people.
My hobbies are breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
I'm not running for President in 2020. I've just decided to start running in 2020.
The crab got its name after marine biologists observed that it had the worst attitude of all the crustaceans.
The Democrats have already decided on their ticket for 2020. Senator Al Franken for president and Dr. Jill Stein for vice president. The bumper sticker should read VOTE FOR FRANKEN/STEIN.
A man said to his rabbi. "I think my wife is trying to poison me."
The rabbi said, "I will speak with her."
The next day, the rabbi said, "I spent three hours yesterday talking to your wife. Take the poison."
My mid-life crisis has metastasized.
Think you had a bad childhood?
Wait until you see what adulthood has to offer.
Why do we need to learn History? George Washington didn't need it, and he was a king.
The Trump administration is running like clockwork...orange.