The Hillbilly and the Yuppie

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by Wayne Hastings

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So this yuppie comes crawlin up my driveway lookin for snipers boobytraps.

Gets outta his cage with a brandnew mailbox still in the box.

I..I..I.`m your neighbor across the woods there... I..I..accidentally backed over your mailbox so I..I.. brought you this new one.

Now hold on I says as he diving for his car...

How bad is she hit? says I

Well was it bent before? he says

I says We better go look at it.

I..I.. couldn`t find you one like it so I got this one.

An obviouis aluminum cheapo deepo.

I, we arrive at the scene of the hit and run.

I says "Now how did you manage that?" My box pole is a milk can with sand in it , is well up on the bank away from the road.

My dog got loose so I turned in there and backed over your box (close to tears.)

So I pick up a rock, I says This ain`t just a mail box. Its part of " Old Loudon."

So I bang the big crease out of the lid.

Its old syle box with the flip top lid made out of American Steel. I fine tune the hinges a coulpe of times with the rock, stick a branch in the lid and lean on 'er, 'tweaks her just right.

'Fool Yuppie jumps in his car and squeals on dirt just like in the old movies.

I just chuckle and slide back up the hill.

Wayne E. Hasting
B/1/501: Vietnam 1969-'70